A client recently told me she just doesn't feel the spiritual connection she used to feel, and she wants it back. She had a major opening a couple years ago and found herself blasted into 5D full time. Within a year, she swung to the opposite extreme - she felt completely disconnected, her vision shrank, she couldn't hear her intuition, and she stopped caring about all the “spiritual” things she’d started doing. She moved into a painful slump, wondering what happened? Where did it all go, and how do I get it back?
Sound familiar? This is such a common experience - particularly if the catalyst for your high-speed awakening was a peak experience such as a physical healing, a sudden release of held trauma, a Kundalini awakening, or a plant medicine journey. There are countless peak experiences that can blast you farther outside your egoic self than you've ever been and give you a sublime taste of Truth that can last a long while. It's easy to become attached to that elevated state and the extrasensory perception it may induce. It's natural, over time, to return to a more planet-bound, familiar You. It's normal to wonder if you'll ever "get it back." Normal to judge or blame yourself for doing something wrong (you didn't). Normal to think you can't "be like that" unless you're in those peak experiences (you can). All completely normal and so very common.
Thing is, we aren't meant to exist in peak experiences all the time. That's why they're called "peak" experiences and not "normal" experiences. There's an ebb and flow to life. Life breathes. It has seasons of creation, manifestation, integration and rest. Cultivating trust in the ebb and flow of life is a practice. And sometimes, the practice itself becomes the experience of connection you thought you'd lost.
Peak experiences require a period of mindful integration. A therapist or a practitioner like me can help with that - someone with whom you can share your full experience, without fear of judgment. Journaling can help. Meditation can help. Making a sovereign decision to maintain your relationship with Spirit - and then actually doing it - is key. (No one's going to do it for you.)
The practice of tending the Divine within can completely change your experience of life - because life goes on after the peak experience, right? You still have to learn communication skills to create healthy relationships. Your body still gets sick, gets hurt, eventually dies. You still feel all the feelings. When you live in relationship with spirit, there's a balance and a loving acceptance that becomes a glowing through-line to all the ups and downs... and you begin to realize you're cultivating the spirituality you always wanted.
Life requires tending before and after enlightenment.
I used to hear the word "discipline" and think of being punished, or like it meant I was being made to do something I didn't want to do. Just hearing the word made me feel resentful and rebellious. At this point in life, my discipline is a combination of devotion and commitment. It feels beautiful - a shining thing. It is my devotion to a life lived with Spirit and my commitment to tending that relationship - which ultimately is a relationship with myself.
And peak experiences - yes! May I gently integrate all I'm ready to bring into the world.
And hello, flow. Inhale.
Hello, ebb. Exhale.
Hello, life. I get to chop wood, carry water again.
Yes, how perfect, thank you, I love you.
I was recently guided to create a one-on-one healing container for women called Divine Incarnate Integration. This container supports you, whether you've had a peak experience or not, to bring spirit into your life. The entrance to the container is a very real threshold. Inside: alchemy. Tending. Being. Healing. Honoring. Remembering. Awakening your spirituality, and enlisting your divine self, in service to your personal healing and evolution. I just opened my schedule for two more of these high vibration healing containers. If you want to join me here, please schedule a free consultation.
I recently had a coffee date with one of my best friends. I was sharing about something that's up for me, when I became keenly aware that she was tending my heart just right. She was still. She held me gently and truly in her gaze. She didn't interrupt, didn't try to fix anything, only offered a space of lovingness. I felt truly seen and cared for, and it brought tears to my eyes - and then to hers - as I interrupted myself to appreciate the gift of her presence. Phew, I really needed that.
There's something truly healing about being held in a space of lovingness and acceptance. We aren't always given that kind of space. Very often, listeners are judgmental or distracted, or they have an agenda for fixing something they see as being wrong - which can hinder or redirect an authentic process. If nothing else, it sure doesn't feel good when the person isn't really with you.
When we're held in loving presence, it's possible to just be. It is a field of clear, high vibration. Here, it's ok to be whoever and however you are. Here, the heart can truly be honored. Here, space is made for your experience to unfold. This is the foundation of all my work: You are welcome here.
I feel like I'm waking up from a dream.
Not because I'm moving through the wobbly weirdness of reentry after two weeks in Mexico - although there is that. It's been emotionally bumpy coming back into the familiar reality of life in Central Oregon. For sure.
But the "familiar" reality of life is different, now that I've traveled for the first time since Covid hit. My experience of reality has changed.
I chose to surrender and accept many things in order to travel by plane to another country - rather than resist or harden against them - so I could receive the gifts of the glorious sun and the comforting beach and the living ocean. Travel required a refined strengthening AND a softening, which ultimately changed my interface with reality. I reintegrated Trust at a very deep level.
This is how we create, right? We make internal shifts (mental, emotional, energetic) to affect our reality and the way we experience life.
Traveling made me break through the invisible, unintentional border I'd created between myself and Living Life. I did not know I'd created such a thing.
But it makes sense. I'd taken fear in and released it out a number of times in the past year. I'm not surprised that hints of it were tangled in my field. I'm human. It happens.
Today I feel free. My belly is soft. I feel stretched out. I feel safe. I feel nourished. I feel empowered. I feel ready. I feel excited. I feel energetically hydrated. I feel like an explorer in entirely new territory, thanks to the 2020 birth canal.
I highly recommend getting mindful to discover any borders you've created inside yourself this past year. I invite you to soften them and take a step across into your own new territory. I invite you to expand your thinking or do something that has seemed off limits but can actually be experienced while staying in personal alignment. You are powerful. You are a creator. Life is short. You are here to LIVE. And I'm available if you need support navigating these waters.