We are in the unknown. Nothing is KNOWN about what will happen. We can make guesses, we can write stories about what it will be - and we can have feelings as a result of those guesses - but the truth is we really don’t know. If you settle into this truth of not-knowing, you’ll find stillness.
​
One thing I do know is that it’s ok to soften your grip on it all. It's useful to tend your state of being - in fact, it's essential. Feel the feelings, yes. Let them move. Let the feelings be gently beside what’s actually right here, right now. We stand in the unknown, and it is pure potential. Bless this sacred space with your attention, your presence. Plant your seed of light into this stillness, and watch it grow.

In the U.S. and around the world this past week, there's much celebration and gratitude happening. So much trepidation and fear growing. And still so much love in you and in the world. It's ok to remember love, today and in the days to come. You can focus your awareness here, in love. It's who you really are, underneath all the feelings and desires. You can tune in to this truth and let it move you, if you choose. Let love move through your words and your actions. It's who you really are.

​Some people navigate their lives using analysis, making choices and decisions from the thinking mind alone. I'm definitely not one of those people, but I can get caught up in thoughts and analysis - and when I do, I become overwhelmed and temporarily forget that there's a much better way for me, an infinitely trustworthy navigational system deep within that can guide everything - creative projects, relating to others, physical body issues, business decisions... everything. Is this you, too? If so, then let this be a loving reminder, Friend:

Your navigational system is sourced from way beyond your thinking mind. It isn't analysis, it isn't something you can learn in a book. You might call it Love, wisdom or intuition. It is your Truth. It wants to be known, and for that it asks only that you slow down and listen.

What would it be like, even right now in this moment, to make space for your knowing? What if you just soften your belly - let it hang out. Let your shoulders fall away from your ears. Make some space at the back of the jaw. Nice deep breath. Slow everything down. 

Feel that spaciousness - even the little bit you allowed just now? This is the starting place for accessing your knowing.

You can call up your knowing about anything in your stillness, with an intention to know what is true for you. Deep in the silence is where your knowing lives. It is where your guidance can be found.

Allow the guidance to be known. You might write whatever comes to you. Let it flow. Don't try to make it perfect. Ask clarifying questions of your knowing - let it be a dialogue. Intend to go deeper and to clearly receive what's there. It can be helpful to speak your knowing to someone who sees you without judgement, with acceptance, where space will be made for your knowing to unfold. When you write or speak your knowing, you give it life. 

Moving through life from this organic place releases you from stuckness and allows movement. It can soften you out of overwhelm. It's a river of peace, this knowing. From here you can take action, knowing you are in meaningful alignment with your purpose (yes, your life purpose). Here there is joy...

... even when the action you take based on your knowing is an ending... because, you know, every ending is also a beginning.

Your Truth wants to be known by you. This life is your creation. When you create from a place of knowing... well... that's when your creation becomes what you want it to be. Your creation comes alive with meaning.

Listen. What do you know, deep in your bones? Listen.

You're worth it.

I am shining infinite blessings of light into your beautiful heart.

Love,
Aowyn

Beloved Human:

I am reaching out through the web of Life to speak to you, to the tender part of you who might just need to hear this right now.

It's ok to be the presence of love.

It's ok to stop criticizing yourself, others or the way things are. Yes. It is safe to release those chains. They stop you from engaging life fully. It's safe to embody love.

It's ok to stop orienting around suffering - yours and others'. It's ok to orient around pleasure. Yes, it is safe to be in joy.

It's ok to bloom into acceptance and embody the love that you are. This liberated space of true caring includes caring about your state of being. When you tend your own heart and mind in a loving, gentle way, you become what the world most needs.

You can be the presence of love.
It's who you truly are.

Even when you think you've made a mistake. Even when you feel embarrassed. Even when you feel regret. Inside you, there exists a love that sees and accepts all of it - every piece of who you are, everything that's ever happened.

You are love.
You can locate in this knowing.
You can see yourself and the world through this lens.

I know this Truth. I'll keep knowing it for you while you do whatever you're doing in your mind and your heart... trying to be something or some way... trying not to be something... trying to fix something that's not actually broken... being hard on yourself... avoiding what feels most aligned...

Even the parts of you that have forgotten that you are already whole are held in infinite love.

Somewhere in you, you already know this. 

You are welcome to tune into it at any time... and loved on every part of your journey.

I am shining infinite blessings of light into your beautiful heart.

Love,
Aowyn

It's true that there's a lot of chaos and destruction happening on planet earth. You can feed it if you choose, and help it to exist. You do this by giving it your attention, letting it into your awareness, and fertilizing it with your thoughts, emotions, words and actions. Increasing the emotions and energy around initiating, criticizing, fighting or resisting the destructive forces helps them to exist, because opposition energy keeps it alive. This is separation. This way of being is a certain frequency you can embody.

Another energy that's at work is that of movement, shift, change. It's an in-between place where you can place your awareness and efforts, if you choose. You do this by seeing the destruction, knowing that healing is possible, and serving the flow of change with thoughts, emotions, words, actions. This is a different frequency and way of being.

A third is the frequency of the new - which is actually our original frequency, before we created distractions to cover it up. This frequency is the ultimate result of where we're at now as a species - the goal of the shift, the reality of our evolution. This frequency is characterized by joy, peace and pure love. You can embody the new frequency now, if you choose.

There are many people who enjoy engaging the opposition, destruction and separation, people who decided long ago that that was to be their mission, during this lifetime. Those people are designed to feed the destruction with their attention, to think and feel and speak it into being, helping it to occur and even to grow - and they are doing their part in our evolution by doing so - we wouldn't evolve without it. Medicine is called into being in response to what needs it. Light shines brightest in the darkness. I'm blessing the chaos, the destruction, the separation, and all who've worked to create it. Thank you.

If you're reading this and know you're not meant to feed the chaos - that is, you can see it, but you don't feed it because you're here to live and work in the flow of healing, supporting people and groups into liberation and community - please do that, and thank you for your light and your devotion to humanity. Thank you, and bless you and your aligned work.
 
If you're reading this and getting a sense or a clear knowing that you're here to embody the "future" frequency, then please, by all means, do it - and thank you. This is a new reality of joy, peace, and pure love. It is an aspect of our wholeness. We can choose to weave and increase light through our entire system in order to embody the new frequencies. We can place our entire awareness in this light, including shining it on the shadows within our own selves and allowing the light to inspire multidimensional awakening and self realization. We can practice maintaining this frequency with our thoughts, our emotions, our words, our actions - until embodying it is a natural way of being, and we live as a tuning fork for others who are called into resonance. This is my devotional path and life purpose. I am grateful to serve by being. I invite you to join me, if you're called.

You get to choose how you play this game. Embodying any one of these frequencies might feel easy because it is habitual. Switching frequencies requires intention, awareness, choice and action. Fortunately, you have all these skills.

I am shining infinite blessings of light into your beautiful heart.

Love, 
Aowyn

​You are exactly where you need to be. Whatever you choose in terms of your evolution and living your purpose is just right. Just by being, you are doing your part in the collective human experience, no matter what you're doing - even if you think you're "doing nothing." You can choose differently at any time if you wish - learn something, dive deeper, participate in the human experience in new ways - but it's not necessary... unless you feel called to do so.

If you listen, you can hear the voice of your Truth.

Truth doesn't use words like "should." Truth doesn't inspire guilt, shame or feelings of being "less than" or "more than," "better" or "worse" than anyone else. If you tune in and what you hear makes you feel bad about yourself or more important than other people - that's NOT the voice of Truth. That's layers of programming you've received from others in the course of your life. 

You can release the programming, if you feel called to do so, to hear your Truth.

Truth is clear. It is knowing. It feels right. Truth inspires. It lights up your unique self, your unique expression. You can tune into it if you choose, and let the clarity and purity of Truth guide you in how you experience yourself and life. You can make choices about how you live in this body, how you evolve, and what you do in the world, based entirely on your clear knowing.

You are now and always perfect, exactly as you are. And if your experience includes feeling called to activate, explore and create yourself and your lived experience from a high vibration place of consciousness and Truth, to be fully empowered in your wholeness as a divine being incarnated on Earth, and inspire others to do the same... I can help with that.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I am shining infinite blessings of light into your beautiful heart.

Love,
Aowyn

​​We humans have been receiving a massive upgrade - and are about to receive even more later this month. Notably, surges of blue light are being delivered to our planet throughout November; the next two are coming through the Hopi mesas in Arizona on the 18th and 25th. Light codes containing infinite wisdom are falling gently into our environment and are being received into our energetic and physical bodies - right into our DNA. You don't have to believe any of this for it to affect you.
​
What are you noticing? What habits and patterns do you see in yourself? Are you having a-ha moments, sudden empowerment or transformation, or a desire to be more true to yourself? Are you becoming more aware of your psychic abilities? Are you being drawn toward healing and self care, more than before?

I'm grateful to have seen these things in me, and am sliding consciously into a vast stillness. There's no need to criticize yourself when you see things in yourself that you don't like; seeing what's in the dark is an opportunity for healing.
​
I don't want you to think that "receiving light codes" and "upgrading your DNA" means you're suddenly going to become a "spiritual person." Of course, you ARE a spiritual person; you can't not be. But you're not necessarily going to start meditating because you suddenly enjoy it... although you might begin to get curious about having a spiritual practice of some kind. You're not necessarily going to... I don't know, how do you think of "spiritual people"? You're not necessarily going to start seeing auras, or having conversations with angels. Those things can happen and they might - or they might not, because you are simply, perfectly, becoming more of who you are.

It's safe to express your knowing - and the more people who do this, the safer it will feel for others to do the same. Expanding is actually more comfortable than not expanding. It is safe to surrender to your own freedom.

As we surrender everything and become free, and express our knowing of truth, one by one we create a new collective reality. A reality where people live in harmony and peace.

It's good to support yourself while we move through these surges of energy. Tune in. What do you need? What kind of self care and self love would be most supportive for you? Let it be absolutely pure. Get quiet, and ask your heart: what do you need? 

If you're operating from the unhealed places in you that are being revealed so much right now, you might decide self care means treating yourself to a day at the spa... even though you don't have extra funds to cover such a thing... so you walk away from the experience with constriction in your chest and worry in your heart. This isn't self care, because it's not energetically clean; it's not in alignment for you. Using my personal example from before: my contracted self has told me recently that getting high would really help me let go of the stress. But checking out by getting high isn't truly in alignment for me - it's my mind trying to run the show by digging up a piece of old programming. When I get out of my thinking mind and let my heart respond, she tells me she needs me to be present. She's asking me to slow down in every way. I find that when I slow my body and mind to be fully present, the energies of worry and concern simply melt away. This is clean self care - truly aligned - and therefore supportive of myself as I go through my personal experience of these systemic upgrades. You see?

There's never been a better time to practice real self care and grounding. It will help you move through the changes that are coming (which might be sudden or gradual for you). 

Know that peace is what's in store.

May your heart be soft and open. May you realize in every cell of your being that you are an embodiment of love. May you dwell in peace.
​
Love,
Aowyn   

Please stop comparing your evolution to other people's. There are infinite aspects to being alive in a human body. Time is irrelevant when it comes to awakening. It is multidimensional and infinite. Some people are seeing beings from other planets. Some people are becoming masterful compassionate communicators. Some are experiencing their divine geometry. Some are realizing that having boundaries is an act of love. Some are seeing signs and symbols everywhere. Some are letting go of codependency. Some people are receiving downloads from unseen beings. Some are learning how to not only give love, but also to receive it. So while you might not think you can show up authentically with your friends right now, you might be developing psychic abilities. Maybe you're not meditating daily, but you're practicing getting good rest. Our evolution is infinite, and it happens in so many realms - emotional, energetic, spiritual, physical, relational... and in so many different dimensions... and every piece of it is beautiful, powerful, meaningful and valuable - inside yourself, in your community, and on this planet. You see? You are a human being, and you're exactly where you're meant to be. It's safe to love yourself exactly as you are. It's safe to let go of comparison, to just be with your own perfect, perfectly timed experience. It's safe to rest in your own heart, to welcome and appreciate the healing and evolution that is already underway. Everything about you is perfect, and perfectly timed. Thank you for being.
​
You're doing a great job.
I love you very much!
-Aowyn

​It's amazing, what can happen if we just tune in to Source (Higher Self, High Council, Spirit, Truth) and begin to name what we want. Ways of being are shed. New ways are revealed and embodied. Relationships are released, relationships shift, new ones appear. We let go of relying on input that truly doesn't serve us, and begin to tune ourselves to what does. When we slow down and connect with presence, prayers and gratitude, we balance and align, internally and externally, and we create the movement we long for.

You're not just your inner world and what you speak and do, you know. You are influenced by what you surround yourself with, what you listen to, what you see, what you read, who you're with. It affects and changes you. And you have a choice in this matter. What are you choosing to allow into your being, to shift and change you? Is it filled with light? Does it inspire you, make you curious, remind you that truly, everything is ok? 

In times like these, it's good to notice the behavior of your own nervous system and be kind to yourself in terms of what and how much you're taking in, and what you're engaging with. It's good to remove yourself or take a break and do some self care. You're the only one who truly knows what your system can handle and when you've been tipped over the edge into things like anxiety, animosity and fear. It is good to tend yourself - not only for you, but because you will be more effective in the world if you're coming from a solid place. You don't need to know everything that's happening all the time. Be gentle with you.

May you be filled with the light of Source in a way you can feel and know. May your inner and outer world be a balanced experience of your truth. You are the medicine, and only you are the unique combination of things that create the medicine you are.

So please, Be.
Be mindful. 
Tend yourself.
You are worthy of tending.
We need you.

Our weather comes and goes in unfamiliar, unexpected ways. Today (in Bend, at least) the chill of Fall can be felt. There is an energy of brimming, of magic. We are coming into the holy space of dying, the end of a cycle - not only in the natural world, but in who we are. The excitement of this season, for me, is in the ending that leads to mysterious caverns within. The stuff of who I've been gets composted, churned, processed, and made fertile for what is to come. Here is the time of creation. The time before the seed is planted or even recognized as a seed.

How do you enter this space, Beloved?

You are the sacred space itself, and the precious light that lives therein. Time to dust away the cobwebs, sweep out the mud, and prepare this temple with reverence. 

I am shining a thousand blessings of light into your beautiful heart.

Love,
Aowyn

There is a presence in you. It is neverending. It is the Source of all things, it is nothing, it is everything. It is utterly compassionate. It is the most exquisite attention you can ever receive. It is in you, it is you, it is infinitely creative, it is where you came from, it does not judge anything, it loves everything. It has no beginning and no end. It is so vast, so neutral, it is nothing. It is undescribeable love. It is forever accessible to you in every moment as a knowing, and all you have to do is turn your attention to it.

With your awareness in this space, you know Oneness.

Being this, you know in every particle and every space that all is well. 

Whatever your journey in this lifetime - whatever troubles, whatever ease you experience - you can know that all is well. You can feel it in your bones. Your mind can expand, your heart can expand into an infinite knowing of this truth. It is relief. It is bliss.

This is not an experience reserved for just some people, some places, some times. It is already and always in all beings, in every place and at every time. It is awareness itself, and when you be it, even for a second, every part of your human incarnation becomes infused with light.

It's not something to reach for, or something to attain. It can never be lost. It is simply, profoundly, a shift in where you place your attention.

It is in you; it is you.

Yes, you can.

I see you.

*

I am shining a thousand blessings of light into your beautiful heart.
​
With very much love,
Aowyn

The key that unlocks all possibility within.
Carrier, bringer of change, activator.
A means for release. A healing device.
A way of welcoming.
This is the breath.

When we breathe consciously, we receive - and come to understand that what once seemed extraordinary is in fact ordinary, innate, sacred.

There is a field of awareness that is available to you. It is utter compassion, it is love, without form or thought - it is even without intention; it is that pure. You can learn to tune into this field, breathe, and dissolve the distortions you've knowingly, unknowingly or intentionally gathered within. All that you are, all you have been or ever will be, is whole.

Breath of life, precious healing device received at birth: Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Perfect design, unending flow and connection of all things: I love you, I love you, I love you.

How about a nice deep one right now?

Might as well relax the body. Soften the jaw. Let the hands be gently open. Soft belly.
​
Now  b r e a t h e  ~

We are Source energy, manifest as humans. Both are important, both are why we're here. We are divine beings, here to experience the game of humanity - the polarity, the interplay of light and dark. The full spectrum. Contrast.

As we learn to embody the Source energy that we are, our personal humanity rises to meet us at that level. It's a perfect design; we are here to collectively experience everything. This is a polarity planet, and none of it is bad or wrong. Even the things that look or feel dark are here to inspire in you a deeper connection with Source, so that you may transmute the darkness inside yourself - not by changing the things or people around you, but by making internal shifts - and create anew from this transmuted space.

Everything is Source energy at play.

There is nothing to fear.

Remember who you are.

There is no one enslaving you, nothing and no one to save. To believe there is, is to identify more firmly with your humanity than your divinity, which is only part of your existence. Your divinity - Source energy - is free. And you have the ability to know this truth.

The experience of fear inside you, or that you see in others, is here to inspire deeper levels of your Source awareness and more conscious creativity in you. 

There is a balance, a way of mastery that is the whole point and the fantastic gift of this wondrous existence: know that you are a creator, and play in the human experience. Use your consciousness. Become masterful. Create your inner experience and your reality. 

As you anchor more consciously into Source energy, your experience will naturally become one of lightness and high frequency. This is the place from which you will then consciously create. It is the place from which you will see the darkness inside and outside of you, and which will change your response to it and therefore change your experience of life.

So check in with your internal world. Notice what's going on in there. It may seem like your current experience is all there is, but I'm here to remind you, Creator: that is an illusion. There are infinite options for how you can feel and experience yourself, your relationships, your life and the world around you.

Everything is in flow, everything is divine play.

And it all starts inside you.

I love you very much. I am here for you.
​I am shining a thousand blessings of light into your beautiful heart.

Love,
Aowyn

One of my favorite benefits my clients receive is relief. When I say relief, I mean stress relief - an actual physical experience of it - as well as emotional, psycho-spiritual, and existential relief. The combination of a high-frequency energy field, lovingness, and the way I guide clients through their inner experience can have a smoothing effect on the nervous system, and a softening in the heart center. It can bring the autonomic nervous system into balance. It can help you know, in a way you can feel, that everything's ok. 

The habit of living in a state of stress takes practice to unwind - whether there's anything stressful actually happening, or especially if something's happening in your life (divorce, job transition, etc.) that might keep that habit active.

This is why I work in containers - a series of 6+ (1.5 hour) sessions. We're together weekly or biweekly, doing the work of unwinding your programs, resting in a high frequency field of emotions/energy, tuning your energy centers, and helping you shift into your preferred experience of yourself. You'll have homework - between sessions, it's your job to spend at least 10 minutes every day in service to your heart.

You are not doomed to be a stressed out person. You have the ability to feel ease, peace and grace - and all the benefits that come from these states of being. It just takes tending.

When I left Portland's coffee shop culture in 2012 and moved to the outdoor rec mecca of Bend, it was hard to get used to going for a hike or a ski as a way to be with my new close friends. My attention gets split - half with the person, half with the activity - and I'm left wanting in both areas. Fast-paced movement and a lack of eye contact makes it hard for me to truly connect with another person, or to dive beneath the surface level. We definitely have fun and, since my friends are brilliant, I often come away from our outdoor play with something new to think about - but I don't get to connect deeply or receive new input and truly integrate it in the moment. For me, that requires spaciousness. Mindfulness. Presence.

When I'm in a slow space with someone I trust, I will consciously open my system to receive the input they offer. It's a choice. And it doesn't just happen; there's a technique to it, and over the years it's become my way of being. It can take friends and practitioners a while to get used to my pacing...

because there's often a big pause while I sort and integrate new input, and reorganize my inner self...

before I speak again from a new me.

This is just how I personally move through the world. Slowness and one-thing-at-a-time isn't trendy; people seem to be moving faster and multitasking more than ever. But spaciousness sure can support a person in healing and upleveling - which is why I'm here.

This is part of what happens in my experiential healing sessions. It's one of the things people appreciate most about my work - I regularly hear it's a relief to people's hearts and nervous systems to finally experience real presence, spaciousness, acceptance and lovingness. It allows you to simply be, and whatever needs tending is allowed to emerge. This part of my work evolved from my training in Hakomi and The Re-Creation of the Self Model of Human Systems.

I don't offer opinions, lessons or advice. I offer a reflection of your own truth. It's my gift to see, and to help you see - with lovingness, and without judgment - your fears, your stuckness, your unhelpful learned beliefs... and to move underneath that virtual reality, all the way to your truth (which you may not have contacted or embodied in a very long time). 

I see your truth (not my truth, and not my guess at your truth), offer it into your own mindful spaciousness, and help you to experience its transformational effect as it unfolds throughout your entire being, moment by moment, body-mind-energy-spirit, while holding you in a field of light-filled resonance and loving awareness.

Clients tell me their experience is real, and it also feels like magic. I call it experiential healing.

I also call my work "shamanic healing" - and there's more that needs saying, once the word "shamanic" enters the field.

There are a lot of opinions regarding the use of the words "shaman" and "shamanic healing" by non-indigenous people, or by people who haven't worked with a mentor to become initiated into traditional ways of healing. No one taught me this part of my work; I've continually initiated myself. I do not consider myself a shaman, but over the years, when I've asked other practitioners and clients to describe my work as they experience it, they've called it "shamanic healing."

This other component of my work is the practice of working in nonordinary reality ("shamanic" or "imaginal" realms) - the other states of consciousness that are induced and explored through the use of hypnotic sound and journey work. The experiential healing I first talked about is woven into this Way. Deep in mindfulness, the human self is tended; in nonordinary reality, the soul can be contacted. This combination invites healing to occur at its root. Here, I (or one of our unseen helpers) might channel a flow of healing energy or perform a specific energetic process. When these energetic adjustments are made in tandem with your mindful inner shifts, they might have a sudden effect on you and your life - or the effect might unfold steadily over time.

My work is multifaceted and holographic. I enjoy playing with language to try to point toward what it is, but it's really something that can only be known through experience. If you ask my clients what I do, they'll usually tell you their lives have changed for the better - but as for what happens during a session, there "just aren't words to describe it." 

My work isn't everyone's cup of tea. It requires openness to intuition and spirituality, curiosity about the self, and the ability and willingness to utilize mindfulness (rather than normal conversation) as a healing tool. There is no magic pill for true change; your participation is required (during and between sessions). If you're ready to invest in your quality of life, and if you want an alternative form of healing and personal growth, let's meet for a consultation and see if my offering is the right pathway for you.

​You are doing such a good job. Sometimes it can be hard to see that when troubles arise. It's ok. You are on your perfect journey. You simply cannot get it wrong; there is no wrong. There is only creation. 

May I remind the deepest part of you who already knows this: in this multidimensional NOW, you are currently living an infinite number of possibilities, an infinite number of lives. There's a version of you reading this right now who's saying "oh yeah, I can feel that", and a version of you who's saying "I have no idea what that means", and a version of you who's open to the possibility of realizing these words, and a version of you who has already stopped reading this - and so many other responses to what you're reading right now. With each response, you are creating a new branch of your life, a new You, who is now off living its own reality, with its own trajectory of experiences, each of which contains an infinite number of choices and possibilities, splitting off into an infinite number of You's living an infinite number of lives... right... now. 

There is no right or wrong. There is only endless creation.
You are so powerful.

Until we re-member our ability to see from multiple perspectives, there's just this one lens you see your life through - the one you're reading this from right now. You'll close your device at some point and face the world from here. How will you do it, Friend? Will you see your neighbor and shame them for their choices? Will you appreciate someone, or yourself, or some thing? Will you resist whatever is next on your plate, and create an energetic weight for you to carry through the day? Will you breathe deeply, invite flow, allow ease? 

This life is your creation.

It's ok to let go of fear. You do not need it to survive. You do not need to hold yourself separate from people who are different from you. Somewhere, sometime, you are believing what they believe, feeling what they feel.

It's ok to quiet down and reach your awareness into another You, one who's got the knowing you want and need in life right now. Somewhere in one of the timelines you're currently living, you've got the answers. You've already experienced everything, and you are free to receive knowing from any part of you. You can just ask. You can ask yourself for love, or for peace.

However you respond to this message, wherever you take it, I offer:

May you be open to more openness. May you see yourself and all things through the eyes of love. May you know that you are creating in every moment. May you hold every experience sacred, and with lightness, and with curiosity - every thought, feeling, sensation, belief, interaction, choice, everything. May you create with love.

I am shining a thousand blessings of light into your beautiful heart. 

Thank you for being. Thank you for every moment of your mindfulness. Bless you. I love you.

Aowyn

I cycle through attachment and non-attachment on a regular basis. I can so easily get caught in my own suffering... but less these days than ever before. I trust in the ebb and the flow of life. Used to be, when I'd feel anything less than ecstatic, I'd fret: Is this the end? Where did my happiness go? I'd search for the reasons - what did I do wrong? How can I get back to that place I love so much? And so came the parade of habits, which generally looked like judgment, criticism, and a general lack of presence.

​But for every inbreath, there is an outbreath. For every expansion, a contraction. It might take me a minute to remember this natural law, but sooner or later, I do. The trust allows me to let go my grip on the good stuff, let go my distress when the hard stuff arrives, and just be present to the wondrous experience of being human. I bow in surrender, watching the tides come and go from a place of stillness and gratitude.

All parts of me and everything seen, included, allowed and held in the compassionate heartfield of the infinite Divine... and so there is no need to attach, because everything is allowed to flow - which it always does, unless I grab on.
​
In these moments I become my own client, entering and receiving the spaciousness I give, shepherding myself into compassion, acceptance and gratitude. It is the epitome of joy. I'm grateful to practice. Grateful to walk the talk. Grateful to be the presence of, and to be in the presence of, grace.

I'm here for you.
​I love you very much.

Aowyn

On this day and in the days to come:

May you live the life you want to be living. May you be fully aligned. May you cultivate healthy, loving relationships, and may you reside in the physical and psychic environments that help you thrive. May you be safe, satisfied, healthy, strong, and nourished in every way.

May your mind be clear and open. May your heart be clear and open. May you be free from inner noise, free from inner struggle, free from nostalgia, free from jealousy, free from bitterness, free from victimhood, free from superiority, inferiority and insecurity. May fear leave you completely.
​May you be free.

May you be present.

May you know and enjoy the experience of devotion and commitment, discipline and consistency. I wish you good luck, good fortune and grounded, intuitive decision-making.

May you be completely healed. May you accept and welcome each layer of the journey. I pray for your ability to accept, to forgive, to let go, and to be present. May you be free.

May you recognize, accept and appreciate your superpowers. May you honor your skills, and may you recognize yourself as a creator. May you bow at the altar of your heart.

May you be fully hydrated, fully nourished, and well rested.

May your body be at peace. May you take care of your body with love and appreciation for its miraculous service, and may you age with a welcoming grace, acceptance and delight.

May you know your heart is always speaking to you. May you hear its voice, whether the call is a howl, a melody or a whisper. May you listen to your heart. May you let your heart lead. May your mind be in creative service to your heart in all things.

May you know without question that you belong, and that you are perfect exactly as you are. 

May you love yourself.

May you be empowered physically, mentally, emotionally, energetically, relationally and financially to make the changes you wish to make in your life, in service to your happiness and wellbeing.

May every door open in your mind, your heart, and your entire life, to support your surrender into a powerful, conscious flow toward your highest and brightest creations; and may your gratitude be a seed of light that radiates from your heart, to land and blossom in the hearts of everyone in your life, and everyone in their lives, and on and on.

Play. Be well. Enjoy.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I love you, I love you, I love you.

Aowyn

​If you're wanting to change something about yourself or the way you experience life, you can go about it in a variety of ways.

You can keep it always at the forefront of your mind. You can hold it with a tight grip, a constant focus. You can work hard. You can experience it as heaviness, a burden or a "have to." You can be angry or disappointed in yourself along the way. You can criticize you. You can try to "fix" yourself. You can let it be all-encompassing in a way that feels boxed in.

Or you can hold your process gently. You can approach yourself and your growth with curiosity. You can witness yourself - and all the things you think and do and feel and believe - with acceptance, knowing that this is a journey. You can be spacious and intentional. You can experiment with new thoughts, new words, new input to your system, and watch the effects.

You can remember that there's nothing to fix, only an experience to have and to create along the way.

You can let your growth process be in your awareness and, at the same time, experiment with how and when and how much and in what way you focus your attention and your effort.

You can take breaks. You can lighten up.

It's ok to play. Please do play! My guess is that the whole reason you're interested in changing something about yourself or the way you experience life, is in part because you want to enjoy being. So please, do. You are invited to enjoy life, even when you're in a growth process.

Only you know when "enjoying life" becomes neglecting what is important to you, in terms of your healing and evolution. You'll know it's neglect by how you feel. It's ok if you hit that point. You can notice it, and adjust to what feels right. Notice that you care about you - you wouldn't be feeling these things if you didn't. Tune into the caring. You care about you and your experience. Let that guide you back into balance - a balance of play and work, spaciousness and tending. Holding it all with curiosity. You'll know it's balanced by how you feel.

This is your unique, precious life. You are evolving, always. You get to choose how you do it.

I am shining a thousand blessings of light into your beautiful heart.

Love,
Aowyn

It's been a mix this past week, huh? Will be for a while longer.

Waves of irritability, anger, frustration and impatience are swirling. You might feel short tempered or foggy - or speechless, but about to burst. Best thing to do is take some space. Breathe. Retreat and regroup. Slow it all down.

If you've already put your foot in your mouth, it's ok. Repair is possible. Just breathe...

... because the other piece to this phase is a profound sense of peace, clarity and stillness. An inner refinement. An expansion of your skill set.

Let the wild mix of thoughts and emotions be in your cauldron. Look at it. What's old and outdated? What story are you telling yourself about yourself that just isn't true? What feels unfamiliar, like it belongs to someone else or doesn't fit with your personal chemistry? What are you doing/saying/thinking that's actually stopping you from being the You you want to be? How are you limiting your life experience? Are you blaming others for your experience? How are you harming yourself or others with your thoughts, words or behavior? What can you let go of right now?

It's all energy. Your thoughts are energy. Your emotions are energy. Your body itself is energy. And you are a powerful creator (so much more powerful than you know right now!). You are able to release toxic energy. It's much easier than you might think. Create an opening at the crown or the root. Let it be a place of release. Make a request of your DNA (or your Spirit, or your heart) for a detox of mental/emotional/physical poison - in a way that is viable and comfortable, and in a way that does no harm to any other being. Thank you.

This is a time of transformation and creation. Use your mindfulness. Take space. Be gentle.
***Practice the new.***
You got this.
​
Love,
Aowyn

You don't have to try so hard.

I know it's easy to look outside yourself - to read the books and listen to the podcasts and take the courses - all with the notion that you should be "getting somewhere" or achieving something, some kind of higher ground or enlightened state. Sometimes there's so much reaching that it feels like you can't keep up, like you're trying to run up a slippery hill... and the information just doesn't seem to sink in. Like you understand it, but you don't actually experience the healing or upleveling happening in yourself. It's exhausting. It promotes the feeling of "not enough."

All that trying can really restrict your body, your breath - even your thinking gets tight.

But you don't have to do any of that. 

You can just sit still. You already have all that you're reaching for. It's ok to just settle in and let it be. Let yourself be. The clarity you seek exists within you, and you can experience it if you only let go the trying. And from here? From this spacious place? YOUR truth is revealed. 

There's no need to go outside yourself to find it. You ARE it. Always have been.

The reason people have success when they come see me is because my work is experiential. What that means is that I'm here to help you experience the state of being you're longing for. We'll talk about what's up for you, but I'm not going to give advice. I'm here to steer you toward actually having the experience inside yourself that you want to be having. So rather than anxiety, peace. Rather than tension, calm. Rather than doubt, knowing. Rather than judgment, acceptance. Rather than fear, love. Along the way, there may be healing that needs to happen - or detachment, or expression, or forgiveness, or grieving. Maybe boundaries need to be created. Or maybe you are longing to be truly seen, and being seen is what allows the shift.

Along with that, I deliver energy medicine that helps you to release the energetic patterns of stuckness that held you in the unwanted experiences.

Often my clients feel like I'm working some kind of magic on them, but really I'm just guiding them into a felt experience of their own true selves - and helping them practice being there, so it can become a way of being. I help weed out what's not serving you, and shepherd your awareness toward the You you want to be (and already are, even if you can't feel it right now).

You are already whole.

There is no magic pill. You can have a profound experience with another human, with a healer, with plant medicines, but the lasting change you seek requires your participation. You are the most powerful person in the room, always, in terms of your inner experience. Once you begin to play with this truth - to actively participate in the change you want for yourself - you can heal. You can be happy. You can know peace. You can love yourself. You can love others. You can receive love - really receive it. You can let beauty fall on your eyes in such a way that your heart is forever softened. This is who you are.
​
If you feel a longing for this clarity, please be in touch. I'm available now for consultations to begin our work together in mid-September.

Today I'm remembering this perfect day on the Baja peninsula last January. I'm so grateful for my freedom to be.
​
I remember myself 20 years ago, when I was still uncomfortable moving my body or speaking in public. I did it, mind you, but with a painfully heightened awareness of myself and of being watched. I couldn't truly drop into my own experience. Even playing my car stereo loudly made me feel like I was on stage before a panel of judges! I was hyper aware of myself - I was self-conscious. An interesting phrase, self-conscious. It feels small. Tight. Restrictive.

You're clearing out so much of what you don't need and what doesn't serve you, your people, or the world. You are seeing parts of yourself that have been waiting for your attention and, as time goes on, you're letting go of more and more. You are making space for love. You are becoming more truly you.

Sometimes it can feel pretty dark. Hopeless, even. Resignation can set in - as though you weren't meant for love, or satisfaction, or pleasure, or peace. Please, notice that a part of you continues to lobby on your behalf. Maybe your self-talk sounds like criticism or sarcasm... but if you get underneath the harshness, you might discover that it all comes from a place of caring, despite the distorted expression. You care about you. You want you to be aligned, happy, fulfilled, and engaged in your life creation.

There's no need to limit yourself with harsh words or false beliefs about who you are or what you're capable of. You are a creator.

Follow your longing.

Thank you for every moment of lovingness you experience. Thank you for your peace. Thank you for feeling grounded, and expansive. Thank you for your compassion. Thank you, thank you for your gratitude. Simmer in these experiences. Notice when you're feeling these truths. With a YES and a THANK YOU, let your heart and your brain know you like it here in the realm of love. Let it become your new habit, your priority.

I invite you to commit to loving yourself.

I'm so grateful you're here, now.

You are important.

I am shining a thousand blessings of light into your beautiful heart.

Love,
Aowyn

There's a feeling of "purgatory" in the air. A feeling of in-between. The density of the last two years is still softening out. And while there's a certain experience of relief, there's also the energy of boredom, restlessness, or even numbness... and a wanting and a wondering: Is it really ok to move forward? There's a push/pull of desire and resistance.

Your longing for purpose is real. It's ok if you feel like you're hovering between old and new worlds, old and new versions of yourself.

Remember, we've only just moved through the Spring Equinox. We're only just emerging from winter's cave. Your longing and restlessness is perfectly timed, in tune with natural cycles. And whether you're in a massive transition - divorce, new house, new job, new town - or courageously preparing to embody the next version of You, you are invited to let your heart know you're listening.

Thank you for honoring your impulses. Feel like cozying up under a blanket with a book? Do it. Feel a solo living room dance party coming on? Do it. Want to scream, wail, head out to the nearest junk pile and break some glass? Do it (with safety gear, please). Is a nap calling your name? Lay down. Want to be outdoors, immersed in the hallowed space that is held for you by the cacti, the trees, the rocks? Get out there. Got a creative idea brimming? Birth it. Let yourself move the energy - or let yourself rest in it, or expand with it. Every feeling, every part of you is worth tending - and it can be a bit of a mix in there, maybe especially right now. There's no need to stifle one bit of it. You are changing, finding your way into what feels really right. Honor you.

And know that honoring your impulses and desires tells your heart: I am listening. And when your heart knows you're listening, it's going to start speaking in ways you can hear. Your heart is your guide. It speaks Truth. 

Patience is useful, but it doesn't mean you have to sit still. Move the energy, move with the energy, and let it burn a fire in you. It will clear the purgatory space and reveal the next part of your path.

I was recently guided to create a healing container for women called Emerge. The entrance to the container is your heart's longing to emerge from your cave. Whether you entered a cave as a result of the pandemic, or you created a cave intentionally as a fertile space of alchemical solitude, or you're just ready to fully embody the You you've been cultivating, this is an opportunity to bring yourself into the world, from where and who you are now. Emerge is an opportunity to embody your aliveness. It is a path of intention. Honoring. Healing. Integrating. Acknowledging your truth. Claiming your power. I just opened my schedule for two more of these one-on-one containers. If you feel called to Emerge, please schedule a free consultation. 

You are perfectly equipped for your unique Life game. How will you play?